Fanservice 101
by Dancing Nightmare
Summary: The host club decides to cosplay as characters from a well-known shounen anime… and gets an unusual request. Oneshot, crossover.
1. Fanservice 101

**A/N: **I have really no excuse for doing this XD I'm not even a yaoi fangirl for crying out loud! Something you may find… _odd_, after reading this piece. I'm a TamaHaru and SaNa fangirl forever, yesh~ Dedicated to all you crazy yaoi fangirls, who I _know _would so request this if the host club was real and did this kind of cosplay. Inspired by this picture: http:// charecua. deviantart. com/ art/ Roronoa-Mori-49655560  
**Warnings: **Boy on boy action. Also, pimp!Mori. **  
Disclaimer: **I'm SO sorry, Bisco Hatori and Eiichiro Oda, for assaulting your characters like this… But it was too funny to resist.

--

Cosplaying days were often not nearly as troublesome as that day had been. The host club would dress up as some random people from an iconic time/place/etc, and the day would carry on as usual. This was not the case today, when they had decided to try something new and cosplay as characters out of an anime, heavily encouraged by Renge. The club eventually voted for _One Piece_, thinking that there was no harm with that_. _But truth to be told... _Boy_, had they underestimated the passion of fangirls or what?

It all started with a simple request that afternoon.

"Uhm… Tamaki-sempai… Ah, I mean _Sanji-kun_" a shy female voice suddenly said from behind the tall blonde king of the club, who turned around to see a short, blushing girl with dark hair in two braids. It was Rena-san from 1-B if he remembered correctly; visited often, didn't say much but was very polite and cute. Her father apparently owned a line of hotels.

"Yes, my sweet?" Tamaki said with a charming smile, and tried to not push the stylized bangs out of his face. "Would you like to request me; Sanji the cook?"

"Ah, ano; I actually have… a _special _request…" Rena stammered while nervously playing with one of her braids.

She looked hesitantly back towards a group of girls who sat on a couch behind her; they looked like they were all holding their breath and one mouthed _you can do it, Rena-chan! _No doubt her friends, probably also wanting to take a part of the 'special request'. Tamaki got more and more interested in this request. What could it be?

"A special request?" he cocked his head to the side.

"I… I'd like to request _two _people" the girl said shyly and started to blush furiously.

"Oh, Hika—I mean young Franky and Luffy?" Tamaki filled in for her, but to his surprise, Rena shook her head.

"I want to request…" she said quietly, too quietly in the end, for the last part of her sentence was just incoherent mumbling.

"Who?" the Sanji cosplayer asked in a sweet voice, truly curious about this. Maybe Nami, who Haruhi was dressed up as against her will, and Luffy, who was played by Kaoru; he had heard they were a popular couple in the fandom.

"Uhm… It's…" Rena mumbled something again and tugged nervously at the hem of her sleeve.

"Come on, you can say it" Tamaki smiled warmly. "No need to be embarrassed--"

"I-I'd like… uke-Sanji and seme-Zoro, together!" she shouted out; eyes shut tightly, blushing madly. Her hands flew up to her small mouth and she gave out a panicked squeak.

Everyone stopped what they were doing, including Tamaki.

He blinked once. Twice.

The fake cigarette fell from his frozen mouth.

… Girl says _what _now?

"Sanji and Zoro are apparently a preferable couple in fandom yaoi shipping" Kyouya, clad as Robin, calmly and knowingly commented out of nowhere. "I googled _ZoroSanji_, and got about 223 000 results. Just so you know"

"Ya-yaoi…?" the blonde asked unsure with a hesitant smile.

His head began to swirl; _223 000 _results?! Oh lord.

He glanced over at who the Zoro cosplayer was, no other than Mori (he had the proper hair for the job). Mori remained silent and stoic and just looked at Tamaki calmly, like he was observing the situation. No one could guess what was going on in his head. The host club leader laughed a little insecurely; how were they supposed to get away with this one? Everyone in the room were staring at the two of them right now, especially Rena-san - the poor girl looked like she might cry, which made Tamaki's heart waver a bit.

Rena's friends waited anxiously, and their faces got less hopeful and more embarrassed with every second that nobody moved.

Mori let his dark gaze slide over from Tamaki to the girls. He didn't say a word, then looked back at the king.

Then, to everybody's surprise, Mori stood up from his seat and walked over to Tamaki, all the while not changing his stoic expression. Tamaki stared at him as if to say 'what are you doing?' and everyone watched them during an ear-numbing silence. The yaoi fangirls' (about 90% of those who were in the room right now, including Renge) hearts beat faster; was he really going to fulfill the request? Was he really...?

The blonde was too nervously wondering what was going to happen, because the dark-haired boy was standing a tad too close for his comfort.

And out of nowhere, Mori suddenly grabbed Tamaki's waist and one of his wrists in a forceful manner, but not hard enough to bruise, and pulled him close. Tamaki was overwhelmed, and his eyes widened in surprise and shock; he was really not used to be playing a part of things like this. Rena and her friends - and all the other yaoi fangirls - gave out the strangled sound of a gasp/squeal, but silenced themselves. Still, even with all the closeness, Mori was all casual, and he seemed normal enough. Maybe it wasn't going to be so bad? Maybe he had something thought out?

But then he opened his mouth and spoke.

"I've seen how you look at me, shitty cook. What is that you want?" he said seriously, with the most eerie un-Mori-like snarl on his face. He was completely transformed, matching Roronoa Zoro to a T. The blonde paled, and the black-haired one pulled him closer by the wrist and whispered in his ear, low enough for only Tamaki to hear; "Play along, Tamaki-kun"

The girls just assumed he had said something naughty in Tamaki's ear and swooned.

"I… I haven't looked… Get away from me, damn... _marimo_!" Tamaki stammered in the best hostile tone and angry face he could gather at the moment; he remembered Zoro's nickname from watching the show once, and figured it would make him stay in character… even though he was blushing and all. Besides, he had to prove that he was the father of this family, and wasn't there a purpose for the Host Club? To please and entertain the ladies, and so he had to do that, by any means possible; he couldn't let his own selfish needs get in the way!

"Hmm? What a cute face…" Zoro!Mori smirked and pulled the blonde closer.

Holy hell.

Screw satisfying the ladies.

"… Are you drunk?" Tamaki asked in a nervous voice. He was seriously wondering what Mori had been smoking lately.

"No, I'm just _sick _of staying away from you, love-cook" Mori said and pulled Tamaki _even closer_, and he _wasn't stopping!_ His face was looking dangerous, even as he steadily closed his eyes. The blonde host king panicked.

_Oh my God, he's not going to—?!_

Then the eighteen-year-old pressed his lips against the seventeen-year-old's lips, knocking the air out of his lunges and plunged his tongue into the blonde's mouth.

Then, after what seemed to be an eternity of the forced kiss (which Mori acted _way _out on), the raven-haired boy pulled his lips away from Tamaki's.

The whole school practically shook with the passionate fangirl moe scream (_"kyyyaaaaaaaaaa~!!"_) that Rena, her friends, and approximately every single girl in the third music room let out. A few of the girls fainted, and a chanting of _Luffy and Zoro next!_ was heard throughout the room as the Zoro-esque Mori slipped into his usual expressionless, stoic mode and let go of the wobbly-legged, almost fainted Tamaki, to move onto Kaoru, who was gradually paling.

And so, the host club learned to _always _research their cosplay's fandom properly in the future, and to always give the might-spur-yaoi-characters to Hikaru and Kaoru.

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**THE END**


	2. Do you want FANSERVICE 102?

Hi everyone!

First, I want to thank you for reading "_Fanservice 101_", I'm so glad so many liked it w

But I have a little request for you; go to my profile page. There's a poll there regarding a second chapter of this fic (_Fanservice 102_ as one reviewer called it), and I'm just curious about what sort of show you'd like the Host Club to cosplay as.

If the response is good, there may be _103_ or perhaps _104_, with yaoi, yuri and het.

Please vote~

/Dancing Nightmare


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